Flushing Away Free Time

I always wonder what the Kool Kats do when they go home from work. I like to imagine that everyone is immersed in a challenging home improvement task, slaving away at complicated recipes, penning the next Harry Potter, attending humanitarian club meetings or catching up with a handful of close companions. But I am willing to guess there's a lot more couch glorifying and TV trance-partaking than any world-changing events happening behind those double French doors.

There's also the choice between keeping yourself up-to-date on the best seasonal television shows and other buzz-worthy programs or crafting purses out of vintage fabric for a few extra dimes. It's "lazy versus productive" pitched against "current versus out-of-the-loop". Where's the balance?

Being a mom brings with it a vault-full of extra guilt. If I'm not spending my free time building block towers for my 1-1/2-year-old to destroy, I always feel a little remorse (except during naptime). If I thought I never had any time B.C. (Before Child), I was out of my mind! Now, I really don't have any time. Or do I?

I struggle with getting any writing, crafting, or other projects to show for my time accomplished without curious digits yanking pens out of my hand or demanding my full attention. Cleaning is feasible with Peanut around, but only to a point. Don't get me wrong, I love engaging Peanut in wrestling, building and hiding games. But I also spend a lot of time thinking about what I could be doing with my free time. Even during Peanut’s naptime, I struggle with the what to do, what to do... When noontime on a Saturday rolls around, I often just want to crash and then I suffer the guilt afterwards of all the life-changing challenges I could’ve taken on during those blessed three hours.

The trouble is, I lose interest in projects. I start writing projects and abandon them. I print off art projects and never so much as buy the supplies. I dream about decadent gourmet dinners but lose interest in bringing them to fruition. But I feel like I need these projects to unleash my creative energy upon.

It makes me wonder if anyone else with these strong impulses to be productive actually do produce anything or if they succumb to numbness once in awhile. It’s much easier to relax into a simple lifestyle and suppress those urges than to twist wire into museum-worthy sculpture. Will the Kool Kats emerge from their basements with an amazing invention one day or do they just shop and get their hair done to rectify their status?

Toddler-fy your Flight

If you’re a mommy looking for tips for taking a toddler on a flight, here are my tips from first-hand experience a short 2 months ago. Now, my son likes toys to a point. A very small point. A few minutes max. This worried me for his first flight…on a lap, no less. I was sure he’d squirm his way out and bother dozens of aisle-seaters, but he actually did better than expected. The key was to have several “activities” lined up for him, one after the other. Our flight also happened to be during nap time, another good tip if your child is able to fall asleep in your arms.

1. Wear the child out at the airport before boarding. After all, you do have two hours to kill. We walked, looked in stores, looked out every window in the place watching airplanes and workers, found another young boy to talk to for awhile and it was magical how he fell asleep during takeoff.

2. Change the child just before the airplane starts boarding.

3. Take a bottle/sippy cup with for all the ear popping. I think our son finally figured out that drinking made him feel better. Also, don't forget their lovies (Blanky) so they feel more comfortable.

4. Encourage your child to watch out the window for as long as it holds their attention. Point things out and explain the flight to them for extra interest.

5. Bring along a meal to feed the child. This can eat up at least a half hour. Little snacks here and there help as well. Just be sure it’s nothing too messy and you brought a bib.

6. Bring along a Magna Doodle and a few books. Also a few blank sheets of paper and a small carton of crayons. It’s difficult to pack the whole toy box, so just pick a few smaller items that have the most potential to hold the child’s interest. Drawings do quite well in little space.

7. Pack your iPod® and let them in on the head boppin’. They’ll get a kick out of listening to your music.

8. Page through the in-flight magazines and fliers. Pointing out airplanes, doggies, and even refrigerators will keep them occupied for some time. Better yet, pack their favorite Highlights or age-appropriate magazine.

9. Some people will give you dirty looks when your toddler kicks their seat a few times (sorry, I tried to keep the little kickers contained, but sometimes it just happens), but a few will coo. Let them coo for as long as they like. My socialite son soaks it up, especially when it’s someone he’s never met before.

10. If there's an open seat next to you and the flight attendants allow it, try buckling your child in to that seat to keep him "in place." Our son didn't even try to squirm out when we tried this. He somehow knew the seat belt meant business.

11. Pack your carry on with a fresh set of clothes, a stack of diapers and wipes. This saved us on BOTH flights. Don’t underestimate the importance of this seemingly no-brainer.

These are what worked for us. But I have absolutely no tips for changing a child's diaper in-flight. Good luck with that!

Fuel for the Fire

I told my husband this past weekend that the bad things that people do to me are “fuel for the fire,” so to speak. Each time I’m ignored, overlooked or have been snubbed by someone, I use that experience as ammunition for pursuing my passions. I’ll write extra pages in my novel, try to outshine myself at work, or create a goal that surpasses anything the villain has ever done. I’ve adopted sort of an “I’ll show them” attitude.

This is just how I am. I don’t think it’s good to only be motivated by someone else’s actions, but I do think that this is a very productive way to turn something unfortunate into something positive. Even if I don’t “show them,” I’m using that madness to spur myself in a positive direction.

Next time you’re faced with a snub, insult, admonition or bad review, visualize the success of something you’re working on. Place all that extra energy, emphasis and irritation you’re filled with into something productive. Instead of punching a hole in the wall, direct that energy into your passions. It also happens to be very cathartic.

I swear Honey, my book about gaming widows is going to be a best-seller!

Boredom of the Mouth

I promised I would have a post about this, so here it is. I have read countless articles about emotional eating and pinpointing its triggers. Usually, if we're not actually hungry, there's some sort of emotional connection when we eat anyway. With sadness, we may turn to comfort food; with fond memories, we may turn to fatty treats; with camaraderie, we may turn to deep-fried pub fare.

For me, it's boredom. Not necessarily emotional boredom, but boredom of the mouth. I feel like I always need something in my mouth to taste, suck on, enjoy. I've found this can be quite dangerous to my health when I make the wrong decisions (oh chocolate, how I love thee), so I've had to come up with a few ways to combat the problem.

The best solution is sugarless gum (Wrigley's Cinnamon). This keeps my mouth busy and occupied for hours. Sugarfree candy and Tic Tac mints are also helpful. I love Celestial Seasoning's Black Cherry Berry tea. With a little sweetener, that practically tastes like candy itself. There's probably something I'm ignoring about artificial sweetener, but I hope a few pieces of gum won't kill me.

Skimp Your Way Thin

You hardly need to spend anything to get fit. If this is your excuse, you can't use it anymore. Motivation is probably the biggest stumbling block of all. But money should not matter.

I am the queen of working out on a budget. I am also the type of person (Gemini?) who gets very bored very easily with workouts. I need something different all the time that doesn't cost me anything. It sounds impossible to please me, but it is not. For eight solid years, I had and loyally used my gym membership, but due to recent money constraints and logistics, I had to quit. I was really worried I wouldn't be able to work out at home, but it has actually worked out quite nicely and I have been able to maintain my faithful habit. The only hurdles I have at home are a 1-1/2-year-old who enjoys sitting on me during ALL floor exercises and a pup who sometimes compromises my form by getting underfoot. Oh, and the dishes and other distracting messes, but I've learned to hold off until after my workout.

Here is my list of budget-friendly workout helpers:

1. I have rummaged, thrifted and craigslist-ed my way to a stocked workout video collection. I don't think I've paid more than $1.00 for a used workout video. You can never predict what you're going to find, so you have to practice being open-minded when going the second-hand route.

2. I also got a sweet treadmill for just $100 at a rummage sale. We have gotten WAY more than our money's worth.

3. A $2 thrift store stair stepper is great for step aerobics and also works as a makeshift weight bench for chest presses, leg lifts and all sorts of other exercises.

4. I have a $1 jump rope that gives one of the best workouts ever. I compiled a list of jumps to try on my sparkpeople blog.

5. I got some inexpensive weights at the store. A 5lb and 8lb set will do for a lot of women. I found my husband found some 15 pounders on craigslist for $15.

6. I have magazine subscriptions to Self and Shape Magazines, which cost something like $12 each for a full year. I have hundreds of workouts pulled from these magazines, and filed away by workout type, that I can always turn to. At best, you can log on to these or other health-related magazines' websites to learn something or print workouts. Self has some really good workout videos you can follow along with as well. As a side note, Self Magazine was one of the first major health motivators for me way back in 2000. The upbeat, anyone-can-do-it attitude really got me revved to start a fitness program.

7. If you've heard it from me before, you'll hear it from me again. Sparkpeople is one of the best free health sites I have ever come across. Here you can log workouts, log what you eat, and look up health articles on almost any topic. There are health calculators, health calendars, community forums and so many things I can't even list.

8. Free workout videos in a variety of different practices and time limits are provided by exercise TV. Also Yoga Today provides a free hour-long Yoga workout every day and offers over 200 downloadable videos for cheap.

9. The library is a rich resource for workout videos, health books, healthy cookbooks and more for free. Or check out their CD selection for fresh workout music.

10. Check out your local video store as well. We have a local one where educational videos, which includes workout videos, are free to rent.

11. For parents, playgrounds offer a really nice workout opportunity that allows you to play like a kid again. Do a Google search for playground workouts to find something like this.

12. A good pair of running shoes provides plenty of workout hours, whether you prefer free local trails, the sidewalk, the treadmill, or the track.

13. For around $300 each, my husband and I each bought a kayak. We have definitely gotten our money's worth out of these too. We barely have to plan when we want to go out for a row and we can drop them in the water almost anywhere that's open to the public. For the cost and the experience in nature, it sure beats slaving away in the gym!

14. I also recommend a set of stretch tubing and a fitness ball. For around $10-$15 each, you get more workout options than you can imagine for your money. If you're lucky like me, you might happen upon these at a rummage sale or inside a workout DVD itself for even less!

Home gym Complete!

Strong Internal Desires

Have you ever had that feeling like you were meant to do something profound? Like trolling along through your day-to-day life wasn't nearly enough? Like you were missing something you were supposed to be doing? I've been having one of those days...months...years really. I feel this strong internal urging to do something amazing, but am at a loss as to what that something might be. As silly as this might sound to some, I feel like with being on "this side" of 30, that prime time to shine is running out.

I don't necessarily desire celebrity or barrels of money. I am not being lured by selfish desires. It's not so much about status as it is about making some sort of impact for the benefit of others. I can't turn this switch off, nor do I want to. I'm just trying to figure out where this internal drive is leading me.

The two magnetic forces that are attracting my "like crazy" are all things nature-related and writing.

But this also makes me wonder if everyone has the same pestering feeling. You watch all these people trying out for American Idol who enter the auditions completely convinced that they have what it takes to entertain the entire country and then they're complete flops. Is this inkling a complete lie then? Are these people just completely crazy? Am I then crazy?

On the other hand, I've read about moguls of different niches that felt that strong push as well. Perhaps it's just how in-tune we are to our real talents, not talents we convince ourselves we have, that determines whether we succeed or fail.

People in Passing

Sometimes people you meet only once have a profound effect on you. Perhaps it's because you don't have enough time to find out about their nuances, idiosyncrasies or other challenges. Sometimes those moments are better left that way, without complication, with one day planted in perfection in your mind.

There was a boy in college who took a friend and me on a canoe ride. It was perfect weather and my friend and I were even dressed up a little in flowy skirts. (One fisherman laughed and asked us if we were going to prom, but we weren't THAT dressed up). The boy educated us about a few flowers and animals. He obliged to our whims, allowing us to "just float" for awhile, as we took pictures of reflections, Lily pads and other flora and fauna. We stopped to put our feet in the water in this little knee-deep inlet where we thought we spotting mink swimming and took more pictures.

I have never seen this boy since then and probably never will. But this happens to be one of the most poignant memories I have of enjoying pristine nature with some of the best company I've ever had.

There was also the man at the Kilgore Oil Museum. This man was the most friendly docent I have ever met. He had shimmering eyes and smiled warmly at me, a little non-descript 10-year-old visitor. After talking with us a little bit, he bent down and handed me a hand-carved (by him) reindeer with little eyes and a red pom-pom nose. To this day, I bring out the little reindeer to put alongside the nativity scene and remember that man who became the highlight of my experience in Texas.